Miniskirts And Guns
by Commander Alice Shepard
Summary: An AU Outcome for Solar, the character in Far From Home. Heavily Mass Effect Influenced, so I'm going to put it here. I'll be drabbling in her past, present, future, and how it effects her past/other's cause I can tell you right now-it will. T To be safe.
1. Unexpected Request

**Finally posting the AU-Hooker!Solar stories! It's the same basic background, but she never met her adoptive parents-she lived as a street rat most of her life, before hitching a ride to Omega and working as a hooker. She still ends up here, due to a kinky scientist client, but she has no biotics (That she can use. The potential is hovering somewhere in her, but without an implant and training, she can't use it) I'm going to tell you right now, it will not be an M fic. I...am not good at writing smut, at all. So I'll skirt around it. Sorry to disappoint.**

**Anyway! Jumping right in, with one of the funnier ones that was one of the first I posted with her. It didn't turn out anything like I had planned it to (It was supposed to be humor, not cuteness) but that's what happens when music and a yummy smelling candle is involved. Also! Solar is 16 in this story.**

* * *

"Wait...you want me to _what?_" The hooker frowned a bit, bracing one hand, fingers spread, on her hip, hiding her shock behind a mask of disbelief.  
"I want you to marry me."  
"...oh my god,you're serious,aren't you?" Solar's eyes widened a bit now, taking in the man in front of her-blond hair, a few inches shorter than her, well built-and thinking about his request.  
Sure, she had some bizarre requests before-pretending to be someone's date to make a crush jealous, being asked to come along on a mission by a regular so he wouldn't have to worry about finding another 'Sparring' partner when he got stressed, even filling in for a mom at one point-but this took the cake.  
"I'm very serious. You remind me of someone... She looks like you..."here he gently lifted a lock of hair from her shoulder, curling it around his fingers before it let it drop again.  
"And...your fantasy about her is to get married?" seeing him nod, she bit back a smile.  
"Well...why do you want to be married to her?" If it was just a sex thing-or a 'wedding pictures' thing, she could easily just stage a fake wedding-he'd get the outcome he wanted, and she'd be unwed like always.  
"I want her to be the first thing I see when I wake up, the last thing I see when I go to sleep. I want to know when I come home she's waiting for me, ready to give me a quick kiss before talking to me about my day..."  
Shit.  
This wasn't a sex thing-she was good at those, prefered those-this was an emotional thing.  
And she knew nothing about that.  
"Ah...ok...I think I see what you mean...?" her voice came out as a slight squeak now, though he didn't seem to notice.  
"Is...that OK,though? I'm guessing...no,I _know_ this can't be normal for you,but..." here he smiled a little, and she couldn't help but smile as well-he just had one of those contagious smiles.  
"I'd love it...and...you wouldn't have to stop working...and...you could annul the marriage at any time and..."he stopped when she lightly laughed, raising a finger to his lips.  
"I have to say, while it is an odd request, it's a nice break from the 'let me use my claws!' type request."  
She wasn't going to tell him she thought it was sweet. She couldn't do that, it'd start rumors about 'the toughest-skinned gal going soft in the head'  
He seemed to know she meant this as a sort of joke, because he laughed.  
"Yea,I kinda guessed that..."  
Smirking slightly, she leaned a little closer to him. "Got a plan for this? Probably going to need a dress..."she gestured at herself-she was wearing black, the exact opposite of what a bride should wear. "Unless you prefer black?"  
"Right,a dress,ah..."  
She could guess what his next question was, and raised her finger to his lips again to stop him.  
"You requested something I haven't even had someone mention in passing before, and it's definitely not something I've done-or considered before. So I'll let you in on a little secret~" Moving closer to his ear, resisting the urge to nibble on it a little like the client she had last night had requested, she spoke quietly enough for only him to hear.  
"That means it's on me-no charge. Just don't spread it around,kay~?"  
Pulling back again, she could see him nodding, seeming a bit relieved-even on Omega, hookers could get expensive. Chances were he had expected a flat out 'No' and hadn't planned for a 'Yes'.

* * *

The wedding was the next night. She had 'taken some time off' to go shopping for a dress, having been given some money by her 'fiancee'. After he had grinned at her 'on the house comment, they had gone to Afterlife and gotten drinks, retreating to one of the quieter tables so they could discuss the details-his favorite color, if he had any preferences for the dress-"No corsets. And mostly white. Maybe just have a trim in blue?"- and her make up-"Something like you have on now is fine...maybe cover your tattoo,though?"- and the meeting place for the wedding. Once that was hammered down, they had exchanged contact info via their Omni-Tools in case something went wrong, and parted ways.  
She had felt something growing in the pit of her stomach since then, something she couldn't place.  
It was when she had found the dress she was going to get that she recognized the feeling.  
She was excited.  
"...Shit..."The only thing that kept her from collapsing onto the ground was the fact she was wearing a pure white-and skin tight-dress, and the floors weren't that clean here.  
"I can't be...it's just a job...It's not like he loves me and I love him, it's just a job!" She continued to mumble to herself as she slipped the dress off, pulling her jeans and hoodie back on, paying for the dress and the few other things she needed, and went straight home.  
Once she had dropped the bag on the couch,she moved to flop across the bed a few feet away,screaming softly into the pillows and blankets.  
Being excited was something new-she had been nervous, she had dreaded, she had wanted to flee, and she had looked forward to a job-but she had never been excited.  
"...I think I'm a little too lonely lately...if I'm getting excited about this..."  
Before she could think about it too much more, her Omni-tool pinged a soft tune to tell her she had to get ready. Shoving herself up, she showered and dressed, throwing one of her trench coats over the dress and keeping the veiled headband in her pocket as she walked, more so they would stay clean then anything else.  
It was a short walk-the 'chapel' where they would be married by a Hanar priest-one she recognized from when she first arrived who she had seen in passing and talked to a few times-wasn't that far from her apartment.  
It was just before she entered that she realized part of his request was to 'wake up next to her, and fall asleep next to her', but they hadn't figured out what they were going to do about living conditions.  
~Guess we'll do that later...~she thought, pushing the door open and slipping into the hallway, pulling off her coat and pulling on the veil, moving away from the door when she heard someone on the steps.  
It was her 'Soon-To-Be Husband', wearing a tux and clutching a sunflower-how he got one she'd never know.  
"Wow...You look amazing!"  
She couldn't help it-she blushed.  
"Thanks...you look great,too."  
He smiled, that contagious smile of his, before he held out the flower.  
"These are for you! I didn't know what kind of flowers you liked, but...I figured a sunflower would be nice and..."  
She cut him off in a way that surprised them both-she leaned over and kissed him.  
"Calm down...You did perfect. I love sunflowers..." How he had known was beyond her, but it did make her happy.  
He smiled, offering his arm for her to loop hers with.  
"Shall we go ahead and get married,then?"  
Laughing lightly, she nodded.  
"Sounds like a good plan~"

* * *

It lasted a longer time than she had expected. He wasn't a super needy man, and he respected her job-he would ask her to not work once in awhile so they could spend time together, but he almost never asked her to pick between their marriage and her job.  
She had been planning on telling him she loved him, and that she was going to quit hooking to find a normal job, so they would be a 'normal' couple, when she got that last client-the one who changed it all.  
She couldn't even call him-her Omni tool had been too badly damaged in the event.  
For all he knew, she had fled...perhaps because she hated him, she wanted a new life, or any other reason.  
The idea ripped her apart sometimes-he may have not been needy, but she had seen the little glances he cast at her sometimes-the ones that said there was more to it.  
She knew he had felt the same. And she had destroyed it for one last client, one last sum of creds in the bank to use while she found a better job, or even to get them off Omega and someplace better.  
And she could never tell him, or find out what happened to him. She'd never know if he was happy, how he handled her disappearance, or if he was even alive.


	2. Never Doubt The Thigh High Boots

**This one happened about...a month or so before Unexpected Request. Solar has a bad client, and deals with it.**

**This was also an attempt at smut,so...Again,sorry.**

* * *

"Ready for another go,Babe~?" A smirk danced across her lips, her eyes kept firmly on his as she ground her hips against his groin, grinning as she felt him harden against her thigh.  
He groaned, low and throaty, flipping upwards so she was on her back, the edge of the mattress digging into her spin slightly.  
He smiled down at her, a boy at the alter, ready for a prayer as he knelt between her spread legs.  
"If I was you..." here he paused, running his nails along the scars that stretched from the top of her breasts to her hips, leaving burning trails on her flushed skin.  
She hated when people did that. She wanted to stop him, to slap his hand away.  
She smiled. "You'd be a hot hooker?"  
He didn't seem to find her joke humorous, digging his nails into her waist until she yelped softly."No. I'd be more worried about getting a head start on hiding.  
Upon seeing her confused expression-She had been so sure he was a decent client-, he grabbed her legs, behind the knees, and threw her off the bed, heels over head, into a pile of tangle limbs and satin sheets.  
"Run,Whore. Run and hide...if you can."  
He had a sick sort of grin, one that reminded her of the Vorcha she had been hired by all those years ago.  
The similarity made her stomach churn, if she had eaten before she would have been sick to her stomach.  
Scrambling to untangle herself, she reached for her dress, for her gun so she could escape.  
"Looking for this~?"  
He had a gun. Damn it all.

It was impossible to run quietly in these damn boots. She had worn them, and left them on, at his request, but now the thigh high boots seemed to be more problematic then they were worth. Still, she couldn't stop to remove them, and even if she did, they'd come in handy soon.  
"ooooh,Soooooo~Laaaaaar, Where are you hiding~?"  
Shit.  
He was too close.  
Slamming her fist against the first unlocked door she came to,she dove in even before the door had fully slid open, waiting in the shadows for it to slide shut before she allowed herself to breath.  
"Shit...Times like these makes a girl wish for a pimp."

"Silly girl, there's nothing to save you here~" he seemed to coo, dripping honey and acid as he stepped into the room, the doors staying open and spilling light into the room.  
"What makes you think I need a weapon?"  
He spun, aiming a heavy-looking statue at her as though to knock her out and finding she was gone, already crouching and sweeping one leg underneath him, causing him to fall and the statue to clatter to the floor heavily.  
They must've heard that in the apartment below, only the high-end places had thick enough flooring to hide that sort of noise.  
But she doesn't have time to think that...she's pinned him down, her elbow on his windpipe to keep him in place and legs straddling his chest,so similar to the position they were in only an hour ago.  
"What did you plan on doing,_babe_?" She's added some acid to her own tone,glaring down at him and removing enough of the pressure for him to speak.  
"I'm going to send you to hell, whore."  
She smiled, slipping one hand into her boot-she had lied before, her gun was in her boots and not her bra tonight.  
"Why don't you go tell them I'm coming first~?"

* * *

She doesn't stay long after that. Only long enough to wash the blood away, pull on her clothes, and tie her hair up-there was no way she could handle another client tonight, she wanted to go home, curl up, and watch one of the old Vids she got in a box for 10 creds.  
"That brings my kill-count to...five. Huh, Seems my clientele is more well behaved then I thought."


	3. New Plans

**This happens a couple of months after she popped into my head...Mid-September 2012 or so.**

**Anyways...enjoy?**

* * *

"I can see why everyone recommended you." he grinned, eyeing Solar as she rolled onto her back next to him,pulling herself up to lean against the pillows.  
"Mmm...thanks,babe~" she purred, looking over at him with a grin-he was a new client, but she had a feeling he'd become a regular soon.  
He smiled back at her, before leaning away, towards the nightstand. She head the drawer open, and things being moved inside, before he growled in frustration and tossed something behind him,barely missing hitting her knee. Curious, she picked the offending object up-a manuscript, from the looks of it,titled 'The Lost Starship', but before she could look it over more he sat back up, the lighter he had apparently been looking for gripped in his hand and a cigarette clamped firmly between his lips. Remembering her, he offered her one, but she declined-she wasn't much of a smoker.  
Jerking his head at the packet in her hand, he held the lighter to the cigarette, muttering as he lit it. "Ignore that,it's a piece of crap...Dunno why I wrote it."  
"Well...yea. It's unrealistic." flipping through the first few pages-out of order, it had a love scene, a fierce battle, a shopping trip, and an emergency that required using a FTL drive to get to a hospital.  
"And what would you know about starships?" he teased, poking the side of her head and causing her eyes to sting from the smoke. waving it away with her hand, she grinned.  
"More then you, apparently. I mean,really" she added, flipping to the emergency scene. "Even a near-fatal fall and a bullet wound could be treated in the med-bay of the ship. If it was a hospital emergency, then it implies that there's no doctors aboard-yet the person saying they need to get to a hospital is a Doctor."  
He stared blankly at her, but didn't tell her to stop, so she pressed on.  
"And the weapons," here she flipped to the battle, "No weapon would have unlimited ammo, even if it was one that didn't need ammo clips-it'd need time to cool down from being overheated. And the armor! You need to make it be so that it covers more of the person, since bullets bouncing off someone's chest only works if they have some kind of stone-skin power." Here he started to protest, but she quickly added "And yea, I know, 'Sex appeal! Guys wanna see skin!' but really. In battles, it's not cool. It's not realistic. Casual wear, that can be sexy, but when someone's on the battle field, they want ARMOR. Not a metal bikini with some cloth thrown on."  
"Are you done yet?" he seemed annoyed, but at the same time, intrigued.  
"Almost...The clothing is too out-there, even for the future, and human-nonhuman, while uncommon, isn't forbidden...ok,NOW I'm done."  
He chuckled, shaking his head and leaning back, wincing slightly when his head hit the wooden headboard.  
"You really seem to know your stuff...how is that?"  
She shrugged-she couldn't exactly tell the truth-before she came up with a quick lie. "I watch a lot of Sci-Fi stuff...things that are unrealistic, or plain idiotic, always jump out to me...so I correct it in my mind."  
"I see. Well, how'd you like to help me rewrite this?" he asked, grinning at her.  
She pondered it for a minute,before she decided. "Well,why not? I could always use something to fill my off-work hours."  
"It's settled then! You'll help rewrite it, and in return...You'll be credited as the co-writer!"  
She laughed softly, shaking her head a bit. "Actually...I want a part if it ever becomes a movie or a play. Deal?"  
"You want to act?" he seemed surprised by this, and she couldn't help but grin wickedly.  
"Honey, I act all the time. The only difference if I became an actress in movies and plays is it'd be more family-friendly."


	4. Why Didn't Things Turn Out Better?

**This happens about two or three months after New Plans. I pretty much went through her past and found key moments and changed them a little.**

* * *

She wakes, five years old and shivering beneath the thin blankets that provide shelter, the dream she just had still fresh in her mind, tossing from side to side until she felt her friend's arms close around her, his hands on her hair, soothing voice in her ears.  
It's familiar to her, in more ways then one- she's done the same for him when nightmares shook him awake, screams in the night.  
Before she's even fully calmed down, she manages to mumble one thing- "Promise me we'll stay out of the ducts."  
Though he's confused, he promises, commenting on how they can stay here in storage or run about the main area , promising over and over they'll stay out of the ducts and on the ground, feet solid and hands linked together.  
Smiling, she nods her agreement, the two falling back asleep as only a child can.

* * *

"Solar? You okay?" the comment is accompanied by a light kiss to her cheek, and she rolls over, opening her eyes and smiling at her husband.  
"'m fine...just had an odd dream,that's all." She pauses, biting at her lip a bit before she speaks.  
"Hey...Mark? I...wanted to talk to you about something."  
She can see the worry cross his face-he knows 'we need to talk' never ends well, but she's hoping that this time, _this one time_, it will.  
"I'm...giving up my job. I've got a good amount of money saved up-I don't spend much, so it's easy to save up- and...I wanted to know if you maybe wanted to leave Omega. Get a house somewhere, settle into 'vanilla' jobs...maybe have kids?" she can tell by the smile that's slowly forming that he likes this, that he's as excited as she is.  
"...You mean it? I'd...I never even began to hope for something like that."  
She laughs lightly, leaning up to kiss his lips.  
"You should know by now that I'm full of surprises, love."  
The pet name jolts him, they had always danced around the word 'love'. They would call each other names from old vids, or jokingly mimic the lover's 'Honey'/'Darling' ones.  
"...'Love', huh?" His smile is hesitant but hopeful, and she smiles one of her rare 'genuine' ones in return.  
"That's what you call someone you love, isn't it~?"

* * *

Before Mark can reply, though, a new voice comes, cutting through hazy walls and ripping aside the sheets.  
_"Miss, you're all set._"  
She jolts, realizing she's sitting in a make up chair, a white robe hanging to one side and prosthetic covering her body to make her appear more 'alien like'.  
Slowly standing, she pulls the robe on again, glancing at the make up artist for a nod to say 'Yes, it's ok to put the robe on, the make up won't smudge.'  
"Seems like you were lost in thought...anything in particular?"  
The girl's just trying to make small talk, she knows, but she brushes it off.  
"...I need to get to wardrobe."


	5. Highway To Hell, Minus The Highway

**I blame being unable to sleep and trying to be social.**

* * *

At first, she thought she was in a very elaborate set.

But then she remembered that it wouldn't fit, it wasn't quite right.  
Slowly sitting up, she felt something sticky on her clothes, and a glance down showed she had a hole in her chest, clear through.  
"Aww, Hell."  
"Guess you know where we are,then?"  
Scrambling to stand and turn, almost falling because-for some reason-she was in a long,swishing gown,she almost cried when she saw the last person she'd ever want to see in Hell.  
"...Linc"

* * *

He was able to stand somehow, almost floating, the mangled remains of his legs dangling down, dripping blood as though he had just died moments before.  
"I'm glad you remember me...but how'd you end up here?" he added, a frown creasing his forehead. "You didn't kill anyone,did you?"  
Rubbing the back of her neck, Solar sighed. "Well...Yes, but they tried to kill me first."  
"Ah. I'd ask if you joined the Alliance, but...I have a feeling you didn't...Ended up on Omega,working the streets..." he trailed off,noticing her puzzled and guarded expression.  
"How do you know all that? And how do I know you aren't a trick?" she spoke so softly her voice was almost drowned out by the noise of Hell, but he could still hear her.  
"I've watched you, when I was able...I wanted to prevent this..." here he gestured at her chest, at the hole and sticky blood. "From happening...I guess I failed."  
"'ts not your fault, you know. I got cocky, thought I was better at evading death then I was." shaking her head a little, she had to smile.  
"Though I must say...this is one impressive playground."  
He chuckled, remembering their promise from so long ago.  
"I suppose it is...though not much fun."  
"Guess we better get to work on gaining control,then."  
"How did I know you'd say that?"  
"Because you know me and how I think."


End file.
